💥✨ I wrote this a while back and feel that stepping into 2019 is the right time to let that shit go…
An open letter to F*ck Boys
An all too familiar term of 2K18, the more we say it, the more it becomes normality and oh it’s just another one. I’m sure pre 2000 this type of man existed, perhaps described as something entirely different with the same sentiment.
I’m writing this for the girls, women, boys and men who have come into contact with ‘le fuq boi’. The same people who have stepped back from a situation and assumed it was all because of them, they weren’t enough, they weren’t good looking enough, or fun enough to fulfil essentially that other persons ego.
A f*ck boy, is the kinda guy that makes you feel safe, you do fun things together, you hang out, text all day and have fun all night. The thing is, you are so busy having fun, enjoying the moment that the pending question just doesn’t need to be answered right now. Or does it?
‘So what’s happening here?’
We are embroiled in a thousand messages a day, getting to know someone, who you actually don’t know. Because let’s face it, a text is an easy form of communication. It doesn’t take much effort and we can say things which perhaps we wouldn’t when looking into the other persons soul.
We then cascade into a whirlwind romance but really it’s just a few A4 pages about someone’s day. And then, the thought of actually just seeing one person is all too much and you get hit with the ‘bye felicia’ moment.
Truth is, I don’t want to swipe right to my future boyfriend. The problem with today’s society is that fashion, food and feelings are disposable. Let’s swipe right to the next best thing because we don’t value another person until we lose them.
I’m a strong, independent woman, yes, yes I am. But I still need a cuddle, dinner cooked for me and a date organised by someone who really cares. Someone who isn’t afraid that THIS, whatever THIS is, could one day turn into something magical because right now we are having a really great time.
I’ve gotten scared before, backed up the guys on speed dial to ensure that if this relationship doesn’t work out, I have the bandaids to heal the wounds and make me feel better about myself. But this isn’t ok, each and every day I preach to women that you are enough, your body is banging and YOU are WONDERFUL. It’s a pretty hard pill to swallow when someone else makes you feel worthless, but there it is… the key to unhappiness – how other people make you feel.
For every guy who wasn’t ready to commit, felt something was missing or just never text back. There is a rollercoaster of emotion that you go through as a woman, I have too often said that I, yes I am the common denominator to failed relationships and so I should change.
But step away from the boy meets girl situation and I LOVE myself. I love my vibe, my body, my personality, my friends, my home and it isn’t until someone else seeds doubt into my mind that I start to second guess who I am.
It’s part of being human, that’s for sure and you will always get back up. But I want to leave this note with a nod to Queen B, after all if Jay Z looked elsewhere, what hope is there?! 😅
Beyoncé was right, for all of those f*ck boys who never text back, dumped you over text, are unable to commit or aren’t ready for a relationship. Be the best thing, they never had.